The Bub in the Belly

Ryan finished his second term of preschool recently. Richard and I attended the usual Parent-Teacher Conference to discuss his progress and development with his class teachers.

Actually, I should begin this post by writing about Ryan's first term in pre-school, which he started in August last year.

In his first term, Ryan was, on the whole, rather quiet and introverted when he was in class. He enjoyed being with others but sometimes he also liked to sit quietly and do puzzles by himself. He wasn't anti-social, he was just a little on the quiet side. He did form close friendships with some of his classmates, mainly because these little ones came up to him and "adopted" him. In particular, there were two little girls who "fought" over him everyday. They kissed him and hugged him repeatedly. They bossed him around and held his hand to make sure he followed them around (and the two girls weren't always going in the same direction). It was quite amusing, actually.

Anyway, the point is that Ryan was well taken care of (by everyone!) and he was happy. He was just not talking very much, especially if he was put on the spot. When he was unsure of what was expected of him or what he thought he was supposed to do, he would clam up. But if the children were singing a song or if they were all discussing something together, he would join in wholeheartedly.

The teachers were concerned that his lack of communication would affect his ability to learn, to interact with his classmates, and to form friendships. For instance, one day, one of his gal pals put him on a tricycle and she rode off on her own, calling him to follow her. At that time, he didn't know how to ride the tricycle so he just sat there quietly. The little girl came back and asked him why wasn't he following her. Ideally, Ryan should have said something like, "I need some help with this" or "Wait for me!" (In the end, the teacher suggested that the two of them get on a tandem tricycle and the gal could cycle the both of them around, which is what they did.)

The teachers said that it was obvious that he knew what was going on, and that he obviously had lots of interesting thoughts to share with everyone. They wanted him to be able to say to his friends, "Hey, I've got an idea" or "I know this!". They wanted him to be able to share, to show off, to interact, to bounce ideas off others.

His lack of communication also affected his toilet-training. Ryan knew the routine, as in, he knew what the toilet was for and he knew how to use it. However, he did not alert the teachers when he needed to use the toilet. So he remained in diapers. This also bothered the teachers because they felt he should have been off diapers.

Although Ryan was not very verbal, he still wanted to express himself which he did by touching and nudging his friends, especially if he was very happy or excited. Sometimes he would even use his mouth to feel them. Not biting, just feeling, but still not socially acceptable. Happily, that was easily resolved within the first few days of school with the teachers' guidance.

So now Ryan has finished his second term. We attended the Parent-Teacher Conference at the end of the term and sat down with his teachers for a chat.

His teachers informed us that, this term, Ryan has made immense progress in his communication skills. As his Mandarin teacher put it, last term he was still in "observation mode", this term he is "veteran" enough to open up. Apparently, this term, he just won't shut up, heh heh.

I'm not going to say I told you so. Oops, I think I just did.

His teachers had nothing but praise for him. They said he is very intelligent and able to quickly grasp the concepts introduced in class. He always has "fantastic" and "creative" ideas (their words, not mine) when they have discussions and problem-solving scenarios. He is socially accepted and has good friendships. He is well behaved and poses no problems in class. The teachers did say that there is a marked difference when he comes to school well rested and when he comes to school deprived of sleep. When he is in a good mood, he starts the day by declaring, "Here I am! It's me, Ryan!" Hahaha!

The teachers also told us that he is always very happy when he brings something from home to share with the class. There is no formal "show and tell" in his pre-school - the children can bring whatever they want to class, on any day, and there will usually be a chance for the children to share their treasures with the others.

The teachers continue to be impressed with his reading skills and they also told us that his number/math skills are pretty good too.

To our surprise, his Mandarin teacher told us that he is very good in Mandarin! She says that he can and does speak in Mandarin while in class and she says his intonation is perfect! She said that his Mandarin is well within the standard expected of his peers and we have nothing to worry about. That was truly a (pleasant) shock to us!

The teachers asked us if there was anything that we wanted them to work on with Ryan. I asked them instead if there was anything we could do at home to strengthen what he did in school. Hahaha, everyone was so obliging.

There was only one issue that the teachers felt needed attention - toilet training! They told us that Ryan was aware that the other children did not use diapers. When it is "toilet-time", he will wait till everyone has finished, then he will hide his clean diaper in a bag and take his turn! Oh my!

Coincidentally, around this time, I was working with Ryan at home on his toilet training which probably added to his awareness. So it was decided that we would put him in underpants for pre-school and just let him get used to it. So far, it has worked pretty well. He had an accident the first day, then survived the rest of the week without any more accidents.